I Found Out My Dad’s Not My Biological Father Through A DNA Test • Part 3


everything’s weird nothing’s weird this is Dori of me discovering my biological father if you want to see part one click here I kind of pointed out [Music] my name is Sam this is my mom Lauren and then this is my sperm donor genetic father Brian the whole thing was funny because I was the one who found Brian and was doing this whole huge surge after at all now my brother was the person who was going to more events and everything because he lived in New York Brian had gotten my brother and fiancee take it to the US Open yes who else is gonna be at the US Open my mom so we found out they’re gonna be there on the same day and I was like okay spill the beans like just say everything tell her everything like they’re gonna meet the Lauren was kind of caught off guard cuz her kids didn’t tell her til the last minute that they were attending the tournament that I would be there so they call her that day of the US Open and say that oak turns out we have met the donor you know we’re actually going to the US Open tonight and he’s gonna be there I knew I was gonna get in trouble for the text that I responded no to in the same day my mom found out who the donor was and that she was actually going to be meeting him at first I was angry just because they surprised me I was overwhelmed you’re always concerned when new people enter your kids lives because the holidays are split already three ways and now are they gonna need to be split four ways because now there’s a third parent in that moment you start to overthink it I’m always feeling a little threatened if this DNA donor dad you know he’s really calling he lives in New York and my son lives in New York and they can go and do things that are really fun and it’s different and it just was probably the the least desirable environment that one could be in to ingest news like that we met up at the US Open at one of the breaks and the sets I couldn’t stop staring at him because I saw physical characteristics of my kids second I looked at him so she told me that when she saw Brian she saw those are Sam’s eyes kind of female version nose mouth and she has your hands since then yes I have looked at my hands and I have a pinkie that sticks out but then what was great is that I was able to get together at another branch that was really nice to get to meet her and really got to know each other because it was just the two of us and so we had talked for hours so very quickly I became very comfortable with him I feel like we have a connection a bond if we become friends which i think is great I mean we’re both single and we both date and it’s really cool to have another you know guy friend after this brunch that you know Brian was super excited he said that they were BFFs the day after the US Open I told my close girlfriend she said oh my god that’s great more to love and I looked at her like she was crazy and said are you can because I was still threatened then a few days later I said you’re right that’s a good way to look at it more to love the whole thing was just cool bizarre I don’t know what you want to call it that our two genetic sources are now friends I guess we’re still navigating like what to call each other and everything we’re navigating social media even like what is where I want to be called I mean we just call Brian Brian I just prefer to be called Brian and then like if I talk to friends and I’m the donor usually donor biological father I reserve dad for my dad I mean for 25 years this was a secret we just didn’t tell anyone the kids didn’t even know and now I’m very open to say oh my kid’s donor you know I’ve actually just called CB 186 that first moment that I met you at the US Open immediately you started talking to me about stem cell and I was trying to keep up with you one of the big questions is does that DNA from somebody else incorporate into your genome to no one’s really quite been able to answer that question it’s been you know eight years since I did my first time cell treatment there’s probably not a sample of my sperm still left in the freezer okay well there’s there’s none for sale anyway I called over there to see if they had one dose left and they don’t I would like to see if the HLA expression for me has changed before and after the stem-cell treatment so that would give you some indication of whether the DNA from the stem cells incorporates into your own DNA or not so is there any way you can find out if your DNA has changed based on comparing it to mine no not really because you have DNA from two separate people so it could just be from Lauren’s tenth contribution to your DNA code what if they compared the Y chromosome okay so if you only compare the Y chromosome yeah so that I suppose they might be able to do that yeah that’s an interesting idea she’s smart I wonder where she gets it all from which one one of the reasons why we chose Brian were for you know just some of the things that we could pick up on the application that are similar to her father what we’re trying to find someone who had some commonality now after meeting Brian I can kind of piece together my nature versus nurture a little bit more and see actually how much nurture I’ve gotten from my dad to make me me and then maybe just some nature aspects that have come from Brian and then obviously my mom too and I think I’m just this combo of all three sources in my opinion best to always tell the truth and to be open I would just suggest that anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation just try to embrace the positive don’t be so threatened by it I think this has just been a great way to expand our family for any other kid or young adult going through this I would tell you know no one’s replacing your parents no one’s replacing anyone but it’s it’s just how you happen to be here and you wouldn’t exist otherwise like you literally wouldn’t be here you wouldn’t be the person you are without all of this you know it it makes you unique in this day and age we’re gonna find out anyway so you might as well be up front and tell us you know there there are a lot of surprises in life this is a good one so do you have any advice for other sperm donors who are in the same situation I would just recommend that if they’re comfortable that they should release the information cuz I mean I always said I think it’s been a really positive experience for me I told the sperm bank that they could release my information but they said I was the first person that had ever contacted them about that so I said well maybe it’ll change now that more people are doing this online DNA analysis I sent in my ancestry DNA and my 23andme and then there’s kids out there that I don’t really know about or until maybe at some point they’ll match up on this ancestry DNA or 23andme I think that every kid has a right to know where they come from I think there are plenty of half-siblings out there who don’t realize they’re half siblings so parents don’t tell their kids and their kids get DNA tests they can find out by matching with other half siblings so then ancestry DNA emailed me that there were updates I go to check out DNA relatives there’s a new one that says close family to first cousin range he’s the same age as my brother I kind of put two and two together I’m like okay this could be the first half sibling match and I said what [Music]

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